Someone from my Instagram community (@shift_the_mind) asked me to write an Article on the topic: “Recapturing joy” and I am more than happy to do so.

First of all, I would never be the one standing for forcing change of emotions. Emotions are just energy that is passing through us and we do not need to change it or run away from it. We need to acknowledge it, understand what it wants to say, feel it to the extent of our capabilities and then make the efforts to get out of it (if it is negative) at our own speed. If you are passing through times where you do not have a lot of access to joy, I would recommend being kind and compassionate to yourself. You are feeling what you are feeling. It’s ok. It all shall pass, too. (for more on the topic read my other Article called: “How to navigate negative emotions?”)

Now back to the joy topic. Feeling joyful: what a good emotion, right? We all want to feel happy, joyful, enjoying life the most and luckily enough being joyful, free and happy is our true nature, so we can always return to it. But… how? How can we make it, keeping in mind that sometimes we face chaos, difficult and challenging times and circumstance? I am offering some steps below that might be helpful:

1. Find your own thing

I wish I could give a generalised answer what joy is about, but it is not possible, as we are all very different and we get pleasure from different things. That’s why I would offer finding the thing that is simply yours and no one and nothing can take it from you, that does not depend on other people, that does not depend on the reactions/emotions/states of being of the people around. Let’s call it: your own treasure, the thing that you have access every time you want to. I acknowledge not everybody found “the thing” and it is probably not that easy for some to find it, but at the same time I believe that people who search – find. It does not really matter how big or small the thing is. For some it will be biking, painting, singing, journaling, creating, going on a walk, dancing, helping children in need, etc. For others it will be creating a product, starting a business, opening a jewellery shop, spreading awareness about chemical free living, writing a book, etc. If we turn this thing that we so much like into our purpose – what a life we are going to live!

As a society we have used to give away our power to other people which put us in a very vulnerable position. We used to think that only if we have someone/something or only if we make someone to behave a certain way, we will feel happy. I am sure that you have heard sentences like: “I will feel happy, if I have a partner”, “I will start travelling once my friends finally agree to come with me.”, etc.  All connections around us are important and undoubtedly, they can be a contribution to our well-being, at the same time there is not a better thing than having your own thing. If you have not found it yet, that’s ok. Maybe it’s on your way, but are you open for it? Are you searching for it? Think about: “What puts your heart on fire?”, “What do you really care about?”, “What do you enjoy talking about?” and starts from there.

2. Enjoying the small things

I know how banal it is, but how much truth is hidden in it? So many people are caught up in the next big achievement and illusionary destination that they forget to enjoy the path? Does the trophy really matter if we do not enjoy the path? No. The thing that really matters is how we choose to be today. You can have joy in the very little things if you decide to do so, while simultaneously doing and going for the bigger things. No one is coming to make our days great, we do it for us and I am sure that everyone has small things to enjoy. If you are thinking that it is not the case with you. I would challenge you with the question: “Are you sure? Have you searched for it?”

3. If you do not like doing something and you have the choice to skip it: skip it

There are things we need to do, although we do not like them. Fine. There are also things we may skip doing, but we keep doing because we are used to, we fear stop doing them or simply that’s the way it is “morally” or “ societally” accepted. The more and more we choose ourselves in such situations, the better and freer and joyful, we would feel. You do not due anything to anybody and the fuller your “cup” is, the more you will have to give to the others, too.

4. In the morning set your mind on the frequency of joy

95% of the day is run by our unconscious mind and only 5% of our conscious mind. Therefore, if you are used to days where you do not have access to joy, it is very likely that the autopilot of the unconscious mind will keep you there and will keep you repeat the same scenarios that are not satisfying, so that you can stay in the “familiar” and “safe” environment for the mind. In order to change the autopilot, we have to practise with conscious efforts the opposite until the new way becomes our new autopilot.

In the morning is the best time to decide how you are going to spend the day: in searching for joy or doing the opposite. You might be surprise how quickly you will see how the positive energy is becoming more and more.

Do not forget: you are that powerful.

With ❤️, Diyana

Author: Diyana Dimitrova